First day of school, university or a new job; this is the time for you to rummage for new mates. Depending on your success rate you could either spend the next few years alone with your cats or enjoy the comfort of your new group.
Having completed each of these milestones, I can quite safety say that I passed. Maybe not with flying colours, but I have all I need. I was lucky enough to meet my best friend when I was 7 and have since then accumulated an eclectic mix of wonderful wallflowers. That said though, a few men did get left behind.
After high school and I’m presuming university, friendships dwindle. Interests and situations change, scattering people across different fields and countries. But, if the person is worth it – believe me, I’ll make the effort. So how do you tell which of your current ‘friendships’ will survive the rigours of distance and time?
1. What is your main source of interaction?
If you only see this person in class or at work, then you are completely, one hundred percent “circumstantial friends.” These are the light-hearted relationships that are ideal for the time-being. That time being until one of you moves onto something new.
2. Would you buy a plane ticket to visit them?
Are you willing to go the distance for this person? Forgive the pun, I couldn’t resist.
3. Do you only ever associate with one another in group situations?
The only way for you two to co-exist is with a buffer. Otherwise you’re both going to be eternally tongue tied. Without conversation, there’s no friendship.
4. Do you primarily chat over social media?
This one is fairly obvious. Facebook messages are easy to ignore. Moreover, if you lack the level of intimacy that it takes to call someone, you don’t have a shot in hell of staying friends.
5. Do you talk to them more than twice a year?
There are always those friends where you pick up exactly where you left off. But, every now and then that flame needs to be re-ignited. If you leave it too long, it may dwindle into oblivion.
6. Are you able to forgive them?
Forgiveness is the foundation of friendship. Long-standing friendships are punctuated with heavy-weighted fights and crying sessions – often induced by each other. But, believe me the drama is necessary. If you’re willing to stay friends with someone after witnessing their dark side, odds they’ll never leave your side.
7. Would you call them in an emergency?
The question is, are they loyal? Do you trust them enough to be there when it counts? If the answer is yes, you’ve got yourself a keeper.