Heartbreak – There’s No Universal Cure

There seems to be a pandemic going on down here in Australia (no I’m not talking about the Hepatitis A outbreak). Instead, I’m talking about about all the newly single girls – the season of break ups has officially commenced. After high school it’s customary to have that serious one year relationship. These are the first loves; the ones that everybody believes are their soul mates. Sure, there are the anomalies that survive, but typically speaking, these are the good things that come to bitter ends. So, as several of my friends are asking me – how do you get over someone you’re in love with?

The answer is simple, you have to work it out for yourself. It’s time to debunk this myth once and for all – there is no single recipe for healing a broken heart. Some people take months to recover, for others it can be over in a matter of minutes. Personally, I have perfected my own break up ritual. Since 2010, it’s been the same process – take a shower and blast Jason Derulo’s “Ridin’ Solo.” It cleanses away the bad memories and let’s me celebrate my freedom. Sure, you probably think I’m insane and heartless if that’s all it takes, but it works for me.

Shut up, Charlotte.

Popular culture has pedalled these myths and fed women’s delusions about a universal cure. The most popular seem to be the “seven stages of grief” or the theory that it it takes half the total time you went out with someone to get over them. If these are found to be ineffective, there are always other alternatives. Lifestyle magazines whose readership consists of the heart broken, terminally insecure or nymphomaniacs (who are dying for a new sex position), are always a great resources. They’ll prescribe a range of breakup tips that include boyfriend bonfires, rom-com marathons and a string of one night stands. And you know what, if none of these work there’s always Tinder or Fifty Shades of Grey.

Now I’m not here to judge, if any of these sound like they’ll help, please give them a go. Heartbreak is earth shattering, so the sooner you rid yourself of it the better. But, at the same time, please don’t take anyones words as gospel. There is no magical cure. Relationships are complicated; sometimes they take time to untangle and free yourself from. Go at your own pace and do what feels natural; you’ll get there I promise.


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